Earlier this week I started a cleanse program. Note, this was not a fast, but something I wanted to do to clean out the system a bit and hit the physical and mental reset button.
Working with my acupuncturist, I geared up and was ready with a diet of mostly veggies and lean meat, no booze, caffeine, sugar, grains, really just veggies and meat. For 21 days. My dear husband wanted to do it with me so we prepared together.
Combined with the restricted food, there were supplements, meant to support the body and assist with ridding oneself of toxins. All food based and not a big deal for 21 days.
We launched on Monday, feeling ready to go through the withdrawals, the irritation and come out on the other side feeling healthier. It all went well for most of the day, but around 4 pm I started to realize that things were headed south in a big way.
I can only liken the following five hours to the worst hangovers I’ve had in my life. I couldn’t stand or open my mouth for fear of being sick. The bathroom floor looked surprisingly comforting to me, I didn’t want to move much. The reaction was unexpected and violent and after it was over I aborted the cleanse mission, at least the supplement part.
Those who know me know I am crazy in the head about my body and weight. I keep it at bay most of the time and have improved over the years but it will always be an issue. While sick on Monday, I wondered about the lengths I would go to feel good about myself. And also wondered if age and maturity may mellow me out.
The good news is that I think I am smarter than I was five years ago. Still not normal but then again that is way too aspirational for someone like me.